Dating fear of rejection

And even when we think we’re stronger than ever, and more independent than before, being rejected might evoke painful memories from the past or cost us our newly gained self-esteem.

Although she can improve her chances by making herself more attractive, she can't just approach men at will without being seen as crazy or desperate.She has to wait until another man (that she likes) approaches her.You are the only one responsible for your dating success. And like in all other aspects of life, you can increase that success by taking risks, enduring rejections, picking yourself back up and trying again. A man needs to initiate with the possibility of being rejected, and a woman has to let the man initiate, with the possibility of being rejected (i.e. Both sexes have to take risk and face rejection if they ultimately want success.

All of this is to make the point that rejection, while difficult for both sexes, is a necessary part of the dating landscape. As I've said before, if you aren't getting rejected, it probably means you aren't dating up to your potential. A woman has to have the courage to let the man walk away, while a man has to have the balls to approach in the first place.While men have to become confident enough to approach without knowing how a woman will respond, women have to become confident enough to let a man act according to his true feelings for her, without knowing whether he will stay with her or leave.When a girl complains about a guy who stops returning her calls, my first instinct is to tell her "You think that's bad?I was rejected more times in the last month than you've been rejected in your entire life.Couple that with the abuse at the hands of his 'strapping Marine' father, who would sometimes wake him up at 3am just to beat him with a belt, and it's clear to see how the man became cripplingly shy and self-conscious.